Friday, September 01, 2006

Coming to terms

Well life has preceded as much as I tried not to let it last night. I was really hoping I would go to sleep and wake up to find out he is still coming home, but as usual, no such luck. I still am very upset, but there is nothing I can do, but go on and start my countdown again. I guess I will just look forward to lunch and computer shopping on Wednesday now.

The thing that hurts the most is he is missing another first. One that he and the boys were really looking forward to. I mean you only have ONE first day of school. I can't reproduce the excitement and nervousness that all of us will feel that day. I mean I can make a big deal out of the second day, but it's still not the same.

In this year...September 2005 to September 2006 he has been gone for 7 months! He missed Kaitlyn's first time crawling, her first baby food, her first time sleeping through the night, the first time she sat up by herself. He missed her first Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years. And then he was home for about 5 months and left again, now only to miss the boys' first day of school. And I know this is the life we decided to live, but that doesn't make missing things any easier on him, me, or the kids.

I guess I'm still coming to terms with all of this and it just might take me until he arrives home.

2 comments:

Sara said...

Jennifer,
So sorry to hear that Robert won't be coming home as soon as planned. That has to be tough, obviously. I am sorry that Robert has been gone so much and has missed so much. I guess you just have to make the days that you do have together special. Hope you're feeling better soon! I wish there was more I could do to help you out. HuGs!!!

Melissa said...

Jennifer,

I'm so sorry things changed on you when you really had your hopes up. Hang in there- he'll be home soon! Until then feel free to vent and cry on my shoulder. :o)

(((((hugs)))))